Huffpost UK “Life Less Ordinary Series”
Some time ago, I was asked to write a post for the Life Less Ordinary Series for Huffpost UK. Today they published it. Here is an excerpt:
I never felt so torn in my life as I did the next morning when David tried taking me aside and asking me whether this was what I wanted to do. His question made me squirm. Of course I didn’t want to go back. I could not explain to David that for those of us who grow up Amish, there are certain things we are bound to do. Obedience is rubbed into the very fiber of our beings and we are often compelled to do things that are good for the community, even if it means going against what is good for the individual.
You can read the whole post at Life Less Ordinary.
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I am looking forward to the comments, here and also in the Huffpost.
Katie, I was too, but not too many of them. It became a discussion between two people about religion in general at Huffpost.
As I said at the end of your piece, circumstances differ but emotions are identical. Saloma, my heart bleeds for the girl who faced all that.
Thank you, Elva, for your comment over on Huffpost. It was the only one there that resonates.
Thank you for your compassion. You faced all that too.
Always a pleasure to hear from you, Elva.
Even though I have read your books and know your story reading your words, I again, feel within me your sorrow and frustration, your anguish over leaving David behind; leaving your heart behind. Leaving behind the life you so desperately wanted. You have such a way of evoking feelings with your words that never, ever cease to amaze me. Congratulations on getting this post published!!
Pamela, honestly, you have a way of making me feel like I am a talented writer. What a nice feeling! You are every blogger’s dream! Please know how much I appreciate you.
Happy New Year to you!
Powerful writing, Saloma, and a story that must be told over and over.
Thank you, Joan. Glad you found it moving.
Salome, Once again I felt so sad about your father. I am sure that if all the Amish suffer as he did and could have had the right medicine so much suffering would have never happened. It is so regrettable that the leaders in the various amish communities don’t have the ability to understand this kind of personality problem, clearly caused by inbreeding. It has nothing to do with not having enough faith, or if you are a christian, you will be perfect (not really). You survived your life before leaving the Amish and I know it made a huge impact on your life. You will carry your past with you your whole life. If we could live our lives all over again and could chose a different scenario, we might react differently but since we can’t we just keep going with what we have. My husband and I had visitors in Oct. I grew up with the husband and he knows how my growing up yrs were and it was very refreshing and healing to hear his perspective on how I dealt with different situations as was my ideas on his situation. One thing we both had in common was the personality problems our parents had because of being so closely related generations long.
Thanks so much for your writings. Marye maarsen
Marye, you this is an interesting perspective. Though I would never have chosen to have to endure abuse as a child, or to live through some of the things I did, I do believe that working through struggles on this earth helps us to grow.
My sister Lizzie probably had it the hardest of any of my siblings or me because she was the family scapegoat. In 2009 after she knew her cancer had returned and that she was dying, I said something to the effect that she has had a life full of struggles and it seems she should get a break. She said to me, “You know Saloma, I’ve been thinking about that. What if I’ve had exactly the life I was meant to have?”
I have thought about this so many times. It was one of the most profoundly wise things anyone has ever said to me. And here we thought Lizzie wasn’t so smart.
And so when I start thinking about how things might have been different, I remind myself of what Lizzie said.
Thank you for your comments Marye. They are very thought-provoking.